This Post is Brought to you by Public Restrooms


Blown Away 

Public restrooms aren’t much for excitement beyond the obvious relief they bring.  That is, however, until I see one of those Xlerator hand dryers.  How awesome are those?  The automated towel dispenser lost its luster quickly and the Jedi like sinks that you wave your hand under to turn on are a pain.  The turbo hand dryer though, is totally sweet.  If I see a regular old hand dryer in your restroom, you can be sure that I am leaving with equal parts damp hands and disappointment.  But if you have one of those turbo hand dryers I can’t wait to put my hands under it and watch the skin on my hands almost blow off.  I haven’t tried it yet but I bet if you bend down and look up into that thing it is a lot like skydiving.

Finding a little piece of awesome in unexpected places is totally sweet.




Do You Guys Sell Hand Sanitizer?  

via Wikipedia

Most of the time a public restroom holds zero awesome.  In fact, I don’t think that I could stomach the travel portion of my job if I had to sit down in those places.  Ladies, I don’t know how you do it.  I have been told it has to do with dark voodoo magic and levitating. My hat is off to you for both the courage and ability to navigate a place like that.

I used to think message boards on the internet were the home of hate speech and filthy innuendo.  Apparently the founding father to this segment of expressionism is the Bathroom in the Swifty Fuel on highway 59.  I learn more stuff that I didn’t want to know from that reading material than I care to admit.

I will spare you from the detail of a particular encounter I had last week, but I will sum it up like this.  Sometimes I finish using the bathroom, look at the sink, and realize my hands were just touching one of the cleanest things in the room.  I walk back out into the store and look for a little bottle of hand sanitizer.  It may cost $7.99 but at least I won’t have to be shipped off to the CDC because of the unknown strand of monkey pox I picked up at mile marker 68.

According to the literature, a good time can be had there on Wednesday nights at 10:45, but I think it is safe to say public restrooms are completely weak.



About Simon

I am a husband and a dad of two little girls. I am a lone Y chromosome and am already planning my escape strategy to deal with the estrogen flood that is on its way. People say there is a lot of joy to be found in the simple things and I have found they can provide a healthy dose of anti-awesome as well. I am, in general, a pretty optimistic guy and needed a bit of a creative outlet; so here it is. Thanks for stopping by. View all posts by Simon

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