Tag Archives: office

That Thing You Still Have

Sweet

The Human Highlight Reel

We all have something right?  An old sweatshirt, a hat, a pair of BVDs.  Something that we have managed to keep all this time.  It may have started as a fluke and just seemed to always be around and by now it has grown into an icon of years gone by and achieved shrine worthy status in your home.  No one understands it but us and even though it is worn and torn it has become one of our most prize possessions.

For me it is this sweet beach towel.  Santa brought it to me when I was a wee lad and it has stuck with me ever since.  How sweet is Dominique Wilkins dunking in all of his short shorts glory?  Things have a way of passing in and out of our life with little consequence but every now and then something sticks around.  I love this beach towel.  Not only because is has the Human Highlight Reel on it, but because it takes me back every time I see it.  Just like the smell of mothballs will always take me to the hall closet of my grandparents house where they kept the Dukes of Hazzard board game, seeing this towel reminds me of growing up on Azalea Circle.  Having a tangible reminder of a  memory is totally sweet even if it does have holes in it.  What is that one thing that you still have?

P.S. Remind me to dedicate an entire blog to The Dukes of Hazzard because little in this world is sweeter than that show.

Weak

Crying Digital Wolf 

Do you see what you are doing there Mr. high importance email?  I notice the trend, everything you send me has a red exclamation point on it and when I open it you are forwarding me a chain letter or asking to buy a box of Tagalongs from your daughter.  That actually may be a bad example because it is one of the few emails from you I have ever responded to.   What are you going to do when it comes time to notify us that you actually have re-formatted the TPS reports?  Do you have a dial that goes to 11?  You are crying digital wolf, my friend, and no one cares anymore.

While I am at it I should remind you that a read receipt on your message should just be called a click receipt because I don’t read any of them,I just click that box to make it go away.  I know that you have a voice and you want it to be heard.  I know what it is like to feel like you are drowning in a sea of cubicles but it is time to re-evaluate.  Are you trying to be that jerk that talks above everyone and always acts like what they are saying is the most important thing ever?  It seems like you are.  You don’t have to reply to all when your message is only to one person.  You don’t have to set up tons of auto forward rules so I get email from you on the nights and weekends.   I am not trying to hurt your feelings I just want you to take a second of self-reflection.  All of those extra email bells and whistles can be totally weak.

This message was sent with High importance.


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